Welcome to Trost University
by LeaveMeWithMyShips
Summary: My name is Marco Bodt. And no, I'm not a guy. I'm not trans. I'm 100%, biologically female. And here is the story of how I fell hopelessly in love with Jean Kirstchien. [college au, Marco and Jean are genderbent, and it's Marco's pov. enjoy! (also, if you have a better idea for the name, please leave suggestions!)]
1. Welcome to Trost

My name is Marco Bodt. And no, I'm not a guy. I'm not trans. I'm 100%, biologically female. And here is the story of how I fell hopelessly in love with Jean Kirstchien.

It was the first day of college, and I was scared. Actually, scared doesn't even describe it. It was more a mix of fear, excitement, and dread. My mom had dropped me off with an "I love you" and "Have fun" and "We'll miss you" and left to drop my little sister off at a birthday party.

With a deep breath, I hauled my stuff to my dorm, but not after getting lost a few times. Apparently my roommate had already settled in or was still unpacking since I heard music from the partially open door. "Hello?" I kicked the door open with my foot. My arms were filled with boxes so I had to move sideways to see inside. "Oh, hey," said the girl from inside. "Here, let me help with that," she said as she took the box on top of the one I was holding. "Thanks." It looked like she had already claimed the bed on the right side of the room, so I set my stuff on my new bed. She had blonde hair that went about halfway down her back, and the left side of her head was shaved and was light brown.

"I'm Marco," I said as I held a hand out. I silently hoped she wouldn't make fun of me for my name. She didn't. Instead, she looked a bit… relived? "I'm Jean," she said, shaking my hand. Ah, so that's why. "Are you serious? I thought I was the only one with a guy's name!" "I thought they were going to put me in a guy's dorm," Jean said with a laugh. And her laugh was adorable, no matter how many people might have later told me that she was scary.

A while later we were unpacked and ready for dinner. "Wanna get something to eat? I'm meeting up with some friends," Jean said. "Sure," I shrugged. None of my friends from high school were going to Trost, mostly because I lived several hours away, and there were several other colleges that were closer than Trost. "Are you okay with going to the café across the road?" "Uh, yeah, that's fine," I responded. I wasn't really a picky person, so I was fine with just about anything.

When we got to the café, I was introduced to several people. Ymir, a tall, lanky girl with freckles, though not as many as mine; Christa, a short girl with blonde hair who seemed lovable (and taken by Ymir); Armin, a boy with short blonde hair who talked like a professor; Mikasa, a quiet girl, and she seemed to only talk to Armin and Eren, a boy who seemed to enjoy poking fun at Jean. It seemed like they were all pretty close. "Did you all go to high school together?" I inquired. I was answered with nodding heads and a few 'yes's.

A while later we all had our orders and ate and talked about school and what classes we had and anything that really came to mind.

"So Marco," Ymir started. "You got a boyfriend or something?" I took my time chewing the bite of pizza I was eating, debating whether or not I should tell them. I swallowed. "Uh, I don't… I'm gay," I said, my voice small. The table was quiet for a moment, and I just really wished someone would say something. "Cool," Ymir said with a crooked grin. The others smiled at me, completely comfortable, saying how they were fine with it and such. Except for Jean, who said nothing and kind of just sat next to me and looked out the window. I decided not to say anything for now.

"Hey, Jean?" I asked as we walked back to the dorm. "I-I'm sorry if I made you uncomfortable back there. You don't have to worry about it. I mean I don't really even like anyone at the moment." "No, no, it's not that. I'm fine with you being gay and all; I was just a little surprised. And I was spacing out for a while; I've got a lot on my mind." I nodded in response. We were silent until we reached our room. "Do you want to watch a movie?" Jean asked with a grin. "Sure, why not?"

Why? Why did Jean have to like horror movies? I hated horror movies. I'm pretty sure I made a few pathetic squeaking sounds, judging from how Jean laughed whenever I jumped. I ended up hugging my pillow while trying not to hold onto Jean's arm or something. I don't think it'd be a good idea, not after what I told Jean and the others in the café. I couldn't tell if she was honest when she said she was fine with it, and I wasn't risking anything. I jumped as my phone started ringing. _'Am I more than you bargained for yet? I've been dying to tell you anything you want to hear, 'cause that's just who I am this week-"_ "Hello?" "Marco!" a voice shouted into the phone. "Hi Sophie, I smiled. "What are you up to? Isn't it past your bedtime?" I asked. It was about 8:00, about the time I would tuck her into bed when mom was at work. "Yeah, but mommy says I can talk to you for a while. I miss you!" "Already? You just saw me this morning." "Yeah, but I reeeeeeeeally miss you!" "Okay then, tomorrow you go and ask mom if you can borrow the computer and we can talk on Skype for a while. I'll call you when I'm ready, alright? Now go get some sleep. I love you." "I love you too Marco! Bye-bye!"

"Who was that?" Jean asked after I hung up. "My little sister, Sophie. She had a birthday party to go to, but if she didn't she'd probably want to see the dorm and 'help' me unpack by digging through my stuff." "I'll bet," Jean laughed. "I have an older brother and an older sister. They're really successful and went to those really nice colleges." I hummed in response, doodling in my sketchbook. "Well, I think I'm gonna get some sleep," Jean said after a while of conversation. "Okay. I'm gonna draw for a few more minutes and then I'll turn the lights out, okay?" "Alright. G'night." I put a headphone in and listened to some music while and drew until I ran out of ideas. Jean mumbled something unintelligible as she slept. Maybe I could… no. No Marco, you can't draw your roommate; not after just meeting her today and especially not when she's sleeping, I chided myself. I sighed and put my sketchbook away, turning out the light and going to sleep.

[Alright, so to all of my old followers, I'm sorry, but I deleted my Soul Eater stories. I couldn't do it, and I just really lost interest in them. I'm really sorry, but I promise to try my hardest to make these updates on this story! If you have any suggestions for the title, please give me some suggestions! Also, if there are any grammatical errors, don't be afraid to point them out to me! I could always use some help with editing and such.]


	2. Ymir and Christa's Party

The next few weeks were pretty uneventful. Classes had started, Jean, our friends and I would meet at the café from time to time to study or just hang out. I had gotten to know Jean better, as well as my new friends. Another thing that had happened in the past few weeks was that no one was allowed to see my sketchbook. It's not that I'm not proud of my work, it's just that… Well, I told myself I wouldn't draw her, but it's difficult not to when I see her every single day. I mean, I love drawing, and she's really pretty, so why not? I drew her when she laughed, when she was grumpy, apathetic, just any expression I could catch a glimpse of. Of course, then there's the issue if she ever asks what I'm drawing. I can't tell her, but I don't want to lie to her. (Not to mention that I'm a terrible liar.) I'd gotten good at hiding my sketchbook quickly and before she could notice when she walked by or came to sit next to me. For example, I'd hide it under my notes, my textbook, or my bag; anything within reach. I was snapped out of my thoughts when, guess who, sat next to me. "What's up?" Jean asked. "Nothing really. I was thinking about asking to borrow Armin's history notes since I kinda spaced out during class." "Oh, well maybe we can all meet at the café?" Jean's phone started ringing. _"Well if you wanted honesty that's all you had to say. I never want to let you down or have you go-" _"Hello? Oh hey Ymir. No, I don't think so. Hang on." She held the phone away from her mouth. "Are you done with your homework?" she asked me. "Yeah, why?" She didn't answer and went back to her conversation with Ymir. "Sure, we'll come. 'Kay, see you later. Bye." "What did Ymir want?" I asked. "Ymir and Christa are having a party to celebrate surviving our first month of college, nothing huge. It's gonna be all of us and a few other friends she met in class and around campus." "Oh, well, I'm not that big on parties so I think I'll-" "Oh, no. You are not staying in here all night. You do that every day, and you already told me you finished your homework. I already told Ymir that both of us are coming, so there's no excuse." I groaned in defeat.

Ymir and Christa lived in an apartment nearby. Their apartment was pretty big, so we weren't very crowded. Inside they had set up a table with food and drinks, and I doubted I wanted to know how they got beer. Once everyone showed up, Christa introduced us to a few of her friends that Jean had mentioned earlier. Sasha was the girl who was first at the food table. She had brown hair and eyes to match; Connie had shown up with her, his hair buzzed so short that you could hardly tell he had any hair. Bertholdt was really tall with short brown hair, and Reiner had blond hair and a ton of muscles. "So now that we're all here, let's get started!" While the group danced and chatted, I decided to grab a slice of pizza, my sketchbook underneath my plate. "You're not just going to sit there and draw the whole time, are you?" Jean sat down next to me, handing me a can of beer while she cracked her own open. I gave her a wary glance. "We're underage, Jean." She merely shrugged and took a sip, giving me an innocent smile. "Marco, if you at least try one can of beer, I'll clean the dorm for the next month _and_ I won't make you watch any more horror movies with me," Jean smirked. Talk about peer pressure and bribery. I let out a long sigh. "Fine," I grumbled as I opened the can. Taking a sip, I grimaced. "This stuff is nasty," I muttered, but finished the can eventually. "Happy?" "Not yet," she said as a new song started playing. "Now you have to dance with me," she beamed and grabbed another beer.

Sometime later, I had somehow drunk a few more cans of beer, and my mind was feeling a bit fuzzy. "Hey… Hey Marco," Jean said, swaying slightly. "'Ave I ever told you how cute you are? Like, your freckles make you super cute," she said, her words slurred. "I think we need to go home now," I said, grabbing her hand and leading her toward the door. "But why?" she whined. "I don' wanna leave yet…" she mumbled. I bid Ymir and Christa goodbye and lead my drunken roommate back to the dorms, supporting her weight most of the way.

After several attempts, I finally unlocked the door and helped her to her bed. "Marco," she said, grabbing my wrist before I could walk away. "What is it?" As soon as I turned around, I was pulled next to her on the small bed, Jean wrapping her arms around me and nuzzling into my back. "J-Jean?" I turned around after some effort. "Jean, you need to get some sleep," I said. She shook her head. I sighed. "What will make you go to sleep?" She gave a thoughtful look and smiled wolfishly at me. "Let me kiss you." "Wh-what? J-Jean, you're drunk, though, I mean, I'd rather you not be drunk when—" She cut me off by pressing her lips to mine, her eyes fluttering shut. I closed my eyes as well, not sure of what else I was supposed to do. There were several ways that this could end: Jean is too drunk to remember any of this, she does remember it and ends up avoiding me, or she does remember and things turn out okay. She pulled away after another moment, and she smiled softly before closing her eyes again, falling asleep. I bit my lip, letting out a shaky breath. This woman would be the end of me.

* * *

><p>I woke up to a dull throbbing behind my eyes. It took me several moments to comprehend my situation. It was Saturday. It was 7:58. I was in my dorm. In my roommate's bed. We were tangled up in the sheets, and Jean's face was pressed into the crook of my neck, her arm draped across my side. "Jean," I whispered, shaking her shoulder. "Jean, wake up." Jean groaned sleepily and rolled over, mumbling something about art class. Art… sketchbook… shit. I'd forgotten my sketchbook at Ymir's! "Jean, I'll be right back. I'm going to go for a walk, okay? I'll be back in a few minutes." She muttered a 'whatever' and fell right back asleep. As quietly as I could, I snuck out of her bed, slipped my shoes on, grabbed my key, and walked to Ymir's and Christa's apartment.<p>

"Ymir?" I knocked on the apartment door. "Who is it?" Ymir asked through the door. "It's Marco." She unlocked the door and ushered me inside. "Forget something?" she asked, a wicked grin splitting across her features. I gulped. Oh no. She found it. And from what I could tell, she had seen the pictures. "Please don't tell her," I pleaded. "Oh? Why not? Don't you like her?" she asked, raising an eyebrow. "Yeah, I do, but I don't know if she likes me like that and if she doesn't and she knows that I like her like that then things will be awkward and I don't want that to happen because I really value our friendship and I just want her to ask me instead of the other way around because I'm no good at asking someone out and-" I was ranting again. Ymir smiled, not in the threatening way that she had been earlier, but a kind one, and handed me my sketchbook. "Don't worry. I'll keep quiet… for now." With that, she showed me out and closed the door. I just hope that she won't really tell Jean.

When I got back to the dorm, Jean was up and making coffee, changed into sweatpants and a t-shirt, her hair pulled up in a messy bun. "Morning, Sleeping Beauty," I teased, shutting the door. I handed her a doughnut I bought on the way back from Ymir's and Christa's apartment. "Thanks," she said and took a bite, stirring some creamer into the coffee. "Want some coffee?" she offered. "Yes, please." I sat at our small table and ate my own doughnut. "How're you feeling?" "I'm okay," I said, "Just a minor headache. And you?" Jean shrugged. "Headache and a little nauseas." "Then I'm not sure coffee is a very good choice to ease your stomach…" Jean gave me a look. "Marco, if there's one thing you should have learned by now, it's that I don't give a damn about how I'm feeling. I _always_ have coffee in the morning." I shrugged as she handed me a mug. "Thanks," I said, taking a sip. "No problem." "What do you want to do today?" She flopped onto her bed and hugged her pillow. "Stay in all day, stuff our faces, play games, and sleep." "Alright, sounds good with me," I laughed. "Oh, by the way," I started, "Do you remember what happened last night?" She looked at the wall in thought. "Not really, why? Did I do anything weird?" she asked, raising her eyebrows in concern. "No, you were just saying some ridiculous stuff." "Really? Like what?" "Well, you said my freckles made me look cute, and then you said stuff about how stupid and annoying Eren is. That's pretty much it." "Did I _do_ anything weird?" "Other than attempt to punch Eren, no."

I didn't tell her about the kiss.

* * *

><p>[Okay so I know it seems like this is escalating quickly, but don't get your hopes up too soon! I have plans (coughcoughnotreallyidkcough) but please leave a review! I have yet to start on chapter 3, and if you have any suggestions, feel free to leave them below!]<p> 


	3. Your Guardian Angel

(A few weeks later)

The last class of the day finally rolled around, and I was ready for a break. I was walking towards the dorms when I heard a piano playing in the practice room.

_"__When I see your smile,  
>Tears roll down my face I can't replace.<br>And now that I'm strong I have figured out  
>How this world turns cold and it breaks through my soul.<br>And I know I'll find deep inside me I can be the one…_

_"__I will never let you fall,  
>I'll stand up with you forever.<br>I'll be there for you through it all,  
>Even if saving you sends me to heaven…"<em>

I walked closer, just enough to see inside the room. The piano was facing the door, but it also prevented me from seeing the pianist.

_"__It's okay. It's okay. It's okay.  
>Seasons are changing,<br>And waves are crashing,  
>And stars are falling all for us.<br>Days grow longer and nights grow shorter;  
>I can show you I'll be the one…<em>

_"__I will never let you fall,  
>I'll stand up with you forever.<br>I'll be there for you through it all,  
>Even if saving you sends me to heaven…"<em>

I know this voice, I thought in the back of my mind.

_"'__Cause you're my, you're my, my, my true love, my whole heart;  
>Please don't throw that away.<em>

_'__Cause I'm here for you.  
>Please don't walk away and<br>Please tell me you'll stay woah, stay woah…_

_"Use me as you will,_  
><em>Pull my strings just for a thrill.<em>  
><em>And I know I'll be okay<em>  
><em>Though my skies are turning gray."<em>

Another moment later, I realized… It was Jean.

_"__I will never let you fall,  
>I'll stand up with you forever.<br>I'll be there for you through it all,  
>Even if saving you sends me to heaven…"<em>

The piano played its final chord as the song ended. I clapped quietly, smiling at her. "That was amazing, Jean. Did you write that?" Jean stood abruptly, the piano bench clattering to the floor. "Shit, Marco! Don't scare me like that! Next time tell me that you're here." "Sorry. You were playing, and the door was open, so I didn't want to interrupt." Jean laughed quietly, shaking her head. "It's not that great, anyways. I mean-" "That's ridiculous!" I exclaimed. "It's amazing! I can hardly sing, and here you are writing music and singing along to it!" She rubbed the back of her neck, and I could've sworn I saw her blush. "Well, don't you draw? I bet your art is better than my music," she challenged. "I-I do draw, but I… I don't really want anyone to see it. Not yet, anyways." Hopefully she wouldn't ask to see it, or maybe she'd just forget about it. We were both silent for a moment. "So, are we meeting at the café today? We haven't met up in a while," I commented, changing the subject. Jean shrugged. "Sure, we probably should since we have some tests coming up," Jean added.

A few phone calls later, our usual group was at the café with their notes and a cup of coffee or a snack. "Hey, does anyone know what they want to major in?" I asked. Armin thought about being a historian, Christa a designer, Eren was set on joining the military, and Mikasa and Jean were still undecided. "What about you, Marco?" asked Christa. "What do you want to be?" "I think I want to either be an artist or an art teacher. Or I could do both; become an art teacher and work on my art on the side." "That's a pretty good idea," she said. With that, we studied and chatted on the side until we decided it was time to go home.

"Hey Marco," Jean said as we were getting into our pajamas. "Do you think I could see your sketches sometime? I mean, I know you said you weren't ready for other people to see it yet, but maybe when you're ready to show it to people?" "Maybe," I said. Maybe, if you felt the same as I do, I thought as I fell asleep.

* * *

><p><em>BANG! BANG! BANG!<em> Were those cannons? "Bodt! Keep your head up!" someone shouted. I turned toward the voice just in time to see someone in a tan jacket and white pants fly past some kind of giant, said giant falling to the ground. In their hands were two blades with a handle connected to each hilt, the blood of the beast evaporating. On the back of the jacket were two crossed swords on top of a shield-shaped crest. "Be more careful, or else you'll end up dead," they said as they glared back at me, then turned away and used the strange equipment to fight more giants. I looked down to see that I had the same uniform and equipment.

What the hell? What kind of army was this?! Killing these giants—these titans, and using these things to fly or something of the sort! I held the odd swords in my hands, examining the silver boxes where more blades were held. I pulled the triggers, wires shooting out of the sheaths attached to my waist, pulling me forward and underneath a bridge, between buildings, behind a titan, and, possibly by some sort of instinct, cut out the nape of the titan's neck just as the other soldier had done. I went on killing titan after titan, no longer controlling my own movements. Suddenly, one of the wires from my gear was pulled. The world spun before my eyes, my back and head were filled with excruciating pain as I was thrown  
>against a wall . A titan walked toward me, its wicked grin fixated on me. I kicked and swung and hit as it picked me up. I could smell its breath; blood and rotting flesh. I screamed as I felt my bones crush between its teeth.<p>

* * *

><p>"JEAN!" I shot up straight, my breath ragged and my eyes unfocused. I looked at the clock. 1:11 AM. "Marco, what happened? What's wrong?" Jean asked, coming over to sit on the edge of my bed. She looked at me with concerned eyes, awaiting an answer from me. I didn't answer her. My eyes stung as I pulled her into a hug, my head on her shoulder. She rubbed my back soothingly as I tried to steady my breaths, my tears wetting her pajama shirt, and at the moment, neither of us cared about that.<p>

"You okay?" Jean whispered. I shook my head. "Do you want to talk about it?" she asked even quieter. "Not now," I whispered back, my voice shaking despite how quiet I was. "Maybe in the morning." I didn't want to go back to sleep. I didn't want to risk having the nightmare again. I wanted to be held until I stopped crying, until I felt better. I sniffled, reaching for a tissue to blow my nose. "I'll be okay," I breathed. "Good night," I added. But I didn't want to say good night, either. I wanted her to lie next to me. I wanted her to kiss me and tell me that everything would be all right. But I knew that that would probably never happen, not in this life time, at least.

* * *

><p>[Okay, so hopefully things will start smoothing out on my end. I am horrible at updating, and so I'm hoping that by at least starting a chapter ahead of the one that I'm posting that it'll keep writer's block away.<p>

On another note, if you really like this, or if you think that I should change something, or even if you just want a sooner update, leave a review! It puts a smile on my face and it also motivates me!

Also, the song that Jean is singing is called "Your Guardian Angel" by The Red Jumpsuit Apparatus.

Happy Turkey Day!]


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